If anger is brief insanity then I suppose we all have sparks of madness, so being angry at my self would be a self inflicted mental malady?
Given an inch but took a mile, went for the instant fix Instead of waiting a while, the grass would be greener if I’d only tried , but I’d rather smoke it and in the moment forget everything and get high.
And I have to admit that there may be a certain irony that comes from trying to eloquently describe the rotten core inside of me. To fit my flaws and faults to a beat, neatly sliding in how I lie and cheat and judge it makes me giggle you see.
When someone cares they care, and when they don’t they don’t, and I suppose it’s when I shift my opinion that I begin to rock the boat. Putting on a poker face to people’s feelings like a heavy winter coat
And I hurt those who are close to me but still they hug me tighter, and when I push them away I can almost hear them tearing in two it’s a soundtrack to a nightmare.
So here I am I’ll take a bow I’m sorry for those I hurt. But at the time gratification could instantly be mine so I was was blinkered to what came first.
And it’s no excuse to try and refuse the love that others give you, but I’m scared as if you accept it could turn to hate and then they’ll leave you.
So when you ask me my name my age and what I like to do, no matter what I say what happens is that I tend to fuck with you, and it’s not for any reason that I hurt those other than myself, except that at the time I came first. But winning the race on your own means that after it’s a living hell.